St. Jude Catholic Church at 21689 Toledo Rd, Boca Raton, FL 33433 US - Funerals
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Funerals |
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EVERYTHING
YOU NEED TO KNOW
“We are so sorry for your loss . . .”
First of all, if you are planning an immediate funeral, please accept the deepest sympathy on the loss of your loved one from the
This website has been designed to help the survivors plan a memorable funeral in which the readings and music will be planned personally by you.
(NOTE: A funeral may also be pre-planned, using the information provided on this website.)
Procedures for Planning a Funeral
The Funeral Planning Visit
Tasks
Instructions for Lectors and Gift Bearers
Suggested First Readings
Suggested Second Readings
Suggested Gospel Readings
General Intercessions
Liturgy Planning Form
Consolation Ministry
PROCEDURES FOR PLANNING A FUNERAL
Shock!
Your wife/husband/child/parent/sister/brother just died from an automobile accident/ heart attack / stroke / aneurism / suicide / violent death / expected or unexpected death. Even if you anticipated the death as the result of a terminal illness or even just old age, you are numb! More than likely, you slip into denial, a phase where the death just does not seem possible. It’s a surreal state of mind which provides self defenses for your body and soul which allow you to temporarily be protected from the immediate severe pain. You can’t think. You are confused and don’t know which way to turn.
Usually, the body is taken to a local funeral home, where you will go to finalize the initial funeral planning. The tasks of choosing a casket or arranging for cremation are very exhausting, and it is best to have a companion with you at that time. The funeral director will offer you guidance about scheduling the funeral and will make specific arrangements for the funeral with the church. At this point, if there is a particular priest whom you would like to preside at the funeral, mention this to the funeral director. Every effort will be made to coordinate the priest’s schedule to accommodate your wishes. There are times, though, if a priest is ill or out of town, another available priest will be scheduled.
After your visit to the funeral home, the church office is officially informed of the date, time, and type* of the funeral by the funeral home director.
*If the body or ashes of the deceased are present, then a Mass of Christian Burial is celebrated. If neither is present, a Memorial Mass is celebrated. There is very little difference in these two Masses.
A member of the Parish Consolation Ministry is then notified and will call you to make an appointment with you to visit you for a Consolation Call/Funeral Planning Visit. He or she will be your representative to the Church and will handle many details for you, as well as pray for you and your family. This planning meeting may take place in your home or at the church. Time is of the essence, so it is important to arrange this visit as soon as possible after the death notification.
During this visit, you will be asked to make several decisions as you and the Minister of Consolation, as well as participating family members or friends, together plan the
Planning a loved one’s funeral may sound morbid, but it actually is a strong sign of love and faith. Choosing the readings or particular songs that were your loved one’s favorites is a privilege and, years from now, you will remember the beauty of the “customized, personalized” Mass for your loved one. Your participation in the planning process is part of the healing process for you. At a time when you may feel helpless and unfocused, this planning provides you with concrete direction . . . you are not helpless or scattered . . . at least in the planning process. Planning a funeral also helps you and other family members get in touch with the reality of the death and takes you out of the “surreal denial” phase, if only for a short time.
The “Liturgy Planning Form” below outlines the information which will be appear on the funeral programs that will be distributed at the beginning of the funeral. It is important for you to consider seriously whether or not any of the people you are choosing to participate can reasonably handle the task emotionally. These people will be given an instruction sheet so they will know exactly how and when they do their part, and if they are readers, they will have copies of the readings to rehearse outloud before the funeral. If one of them simply cannot do it on the day of the funeral, the Minister of Consolation will take over for them, or stand with them at the microphone encouraging them.
Choose three readings (First Reading, Second Reading and the Gospel) and choose five to eight intercessions from the list. These intercessions can my composed by the family but should be written out ahead of time.
Choose the readers (lectors) for these readings and intercessions (not for the Gospel, though, since the priest will read that.)
Choose two to four gift bearers (who may be children or grandchildren) who will bring the bread and the wine, etc., to the altar.
The people listed above will all be named in the program. However, there are other people (who will not be named in the program) that you should be thinking about, too. For instance, the pallbearers, the Eucharistic Ministers (if you want to choose friends who are trained and commissioned as Eucharistic Ministers in a Catholic Church).
Provide particular information concerning:
a. whether or not military honors are appropriate. If so, the funeral home makes these arrangements with the proper military service.
b. whom you might like to receive memorial donations “in lieu of flowers.” These can be directed to any nonprofit organization. Many people ask their friends for donations to the church, hospice, a scholarship fund, a college or university, etc. The exact address is required for the funeral program.
c. whether or not you will be having a reception after the funeral. Where? Is everyone invited? Directions needed? Note: The
Music. If you desire music for the funeral, you must call the Music Minister, Rosemary Stone, at 561-482-1414. She will direct you in making appropriate musical choices.
Costs. Normally, the costs for the use of the church and and the music costs are included in the comprehensive bill provided by the Funeral Home. (Please check with the funeral director for the current costs.) If the funeral home does not provide this billing, separate checks should then be written to St. Jude Church and to the St. Jude Music Ministry.
Flowers. Arrangements for flowers must be made directly with the florist and may be taken after the funeral to the reception or your home. If left at the Church they will be viewed by parishioners as a remembrance of your loved ones.
Instructions for Lectors and Gift Bearers
Lector for first reading
Immediately after the opening prayer, while the people are sitting down, walk up to the ambo (pulpit) and take your place. You do not need to carry the reading with you. It will be on the ambo. Adjust the microphone to your height. Read the reading and finish with “The word of the Lord.” Be especially careful as you step down from the ambo and return to your seat. Hints: Prepare ahead of time. Read it out loud multiple times. Read slowly. Pause at periods. Speak up because the audio system expects a strong voice.
Lector for the second reading
Immediately after the first reading, a responsorial song will be sung. When it is completed, walk up to the ambo (pulpit) and take your place. You do not need to carry the reading with you. It will be on the ambo. Adjust the microphone to your height. Read the reading and finish with “The word of the Lord.” Step down from the ambo and return to your seat. Hints: Prepare ahead of time. Read it out loud multiple times. Read slowly. Pause at periods. Speak up because the audio system expects a strong voice.
Reader of the Prayers of Intercessions
Immediately after the homily, the priest will return to his chair. (The priest may pause for a few moments of silent reflection on the thoughts in the homily.) While he is doing this, walk to the ambo (pulpit) and take your place. You do not need to carry the intercessions with you. They will be on the ambo. Adjust the microphone to your height. After the priest reads the short opening prayer, read the prayers of intercession. After the last one, remain at the ambo until the priest completes the closing prayer; then return to your seat. Hints: Prepare ahead of time. Read it out loud multiple times. Read slowly. Speak up because the audio system expects a strong voice. Look at the congregation occasionally. This is easier the more you prepare.
Gift Bearers
Immediately after the Prayers of Intercessions, walk to the rear of the church to get the gifts. One will carry the bread and one the wine. If there are others they will walk behind you. But you may request other liturgical objects such as the chalice and linens for the chalice, etc., for the other two people. Carry them to the front and present them to the priest. After he has received them, return to your seat without bows or genuflections. Always walk slowly and reverently. There is no hurry.
